Wednesday, June 17, 2009

New Do (Don't)

I have had very bad luck with hair dressers since moving from the States to Europe and now the UK. I don't quite understand it, but I always get a great hair cut and stellar color in the States, and I never go to the same place twice, but across the pond is a different story.

When we lived in Zurich, I went once to a posh hair salon and the results were very good-- not better than I get in the States, but way better than I had previously received in Switzerland. The price was remarkable, as well; Including the bottle of shampoo I bought the bill totalled $450. As I said, I only went to that salon once.

So, it was with great reservations that I looked for a new hair salon here in England. I asked my friend Suzy where she went to get her hair done. Suzy is an American and gets about the same amount of artificial color painted onto her tresses as I do, so I figured if it looked good on her, it would probably work on me, too.

I called and was able to get in the same day for the color, but would have to come back the following day for the cut-- no problem. My hair had gotten to the point where I looked as if I had taken up residence at the Blackpool Trailer Park, I was willing to travel anywhere as many times as necessary to fix it.

Yesterday was the color and it turned out great-- better than anything I have had yet in the past six years. I walked, no, I skipped out of the salon, happy.

Today was the cut...

I showed the cutting lady (because she was a different lady from the coloring lady) a picture of Heidi Klum-- okay YES, a stretch, but her hair was what I was after. Sleek, shoulder-length golden hair with a sweep of fringe (bangs) seductively hanging off to the right, sort of covering one eye, if you will.

Two hours later, really two hours, I looked in the mirror and saw... Martha Stewart-- on the day she was released from prison.
'Do you like it?' Cutting lady asked. 'NO!!!' was all I could scream in my head, but what could she going to do about it now? So I smiled and nodded and said, 'Yes, it's cute. Thanks.'
I even tipped her (which is not expected here).

At the cash register a well groomed woman wearing all black rushed over to me and handed me a card with beauty treatments listed on it. 'For the next month, we are offering facials for more mature skin one third off!' I smiled, nodded and even said, 'thanks', but didn't tip her.

I walked to the little girls pre-school. On my way I passed an American woman I don't really know, but see around. 'Hey, cute hair cut! You look like Martha Stewart!' She shouted over her shouldr at me. I smiled, nodded and shouted back 'thanks' (didn't tip her, either).

At home Claire, my oldest said, 'Mama, I know now who you look like! A cross between Melissa Ethridge and Ellen Degeneres!' she enthused.

I was sliding backwards; one rung down from jail-bird era Martha on to the dueling icons of lesbian celebrity.

After swimming lessons that evening, as I was getting the twins in the car, Tess said to me, 'Mama, during my class I looked at you and thought you were a granny.'

Hair grows, right?


Kimberly said...

Ok Jenny - give us a picture. Let us see this haircut! And yes, dear, it will grow.

Ruth said...

You are too funny .... but at lease she didn't say grandpa ..!!

Expats said...

Next time get an appointment with someone who actually is supposed to cut hair! You left out the part about the towel girl had offered to cut your hair...

Go ahead and make an appointment with Colin now. He stays booked up about 5 or 6 weeks.

And for everyone who hasn't seen Jenny, I think she looks very Sexy!